Why can't I step on cracks?

Sometimes I wish someone else could enter my head. Someone to help me figure out why I am the way that I am. Im quite the odd duck... Speaking about ducks!, here is a picture of a duck I took during the summer.


wow...random tangent.

I try to be "cool" but let's face it...
I AM ODD.
I can't help it. Its the way God made... And God don't make no junk:)

I was walking to school today and I caught my self singing to myself, out loud.

Don't step on a crack or you'll fall and break your back.
Don't step on a crack or you'll fall and break your back.

repeated over and over

And then I realized for the last 5 minutes I had not stepped on one crack in the sidewalk... Then, for the remainder of my journey I could not bring myself to step on one measly crack. WHAT THE HECK? Who does that?

Also when cars would pass me I would glare at them and then say to myself out loud...

"What you lookin at Willis?"

Then I would giggle to myself... out loud.



I seriously could entertain myself for hours.


happy thursday!

loves. hugs.

jess

BLING BLING

When I was a little girl, I used to sit in church and pry her ring off her finger. I would play with it pretending that it was MINE. That my dreamy prince had just put it on my tiny little girly fingers. With my baby eyes the diamond was SO big and sparkly. I thought it was the BEST wedding ring in the whole entire world.

Years and years have past since those early church days of fantasizing that such a sparkly ring would grace my fingers. I now sit in church and play with that SAME ring. And my prince?... He sits right next to me during church.

Three years ago today, Robbie proposed to me and placed her ring on my finger. It's been the happiest three years of my ring finger's life!

FOR SALE

Call me CRAZY, but I don't feel there is a need for this sign.....






Talk about a hunk of junk!

CHILE EARTHQUAKE

This is some what lengthy, but TOTALLY worth every second of your day.
SERIOUSLY!

This is a letter a good family friend sent after the Chile Earthquake. Her and her husband are serving as Mission President and wife over the Santiago East Chile Mission. This letter was published by Meridian Magazine. If you want to read the whole article click HERE.

Here some highlights from the letter....

When we were set apart for this calling, Elder Scott of the Council of the Twelve Apostles taught us many important lessons. He spoke from personal experience when he was a mission president in Argentina. One message that he shared with us is this: "At times, during your mission, you will be awakened in the middle of the night or the early morning hours with thoughts of specific things you should do for certain missionaries. Do not ignore these thoughts. They are promptings from the Holy Ghost who will communicate with you in the stillness of the night or the peace of the early morning hours. He will speak to you then because that is when you are still enough to hear."

Elder Scott further instructed us to keep a notebook beside our bed so that we could record these precious promptings. He said that by the next morning, we would be likely to forget the promptings if we didn't write them down.

We have been astonished at the fulfillment of Elder Scott's prophetic words. We have received many promptings in the exact manner that Elder Scott described. We are so thankful that Elder Scott taught us how to recognize and act upon these precious promptings. Had he not taught us, we may not have given these promptings the attention they require.

Nearly two-and-one-half weeks ago, I was awakened at around 4:00 AM by just such a prompting. I did not hear a voice, but the thought was as clear as if it had been in the form of spoken words: "There is going to be an earthquake. Prepare your missionaries." I sat up in bed and immediately remembered Elder Scott's counsel. That morning I told Larry what had happened. He immediately set to work organizing our missionaries to prepare for an earthquake........


We set a goal and arranged our schedule so that we could visit every apartment in the mission to check for safety and to review with our missionaries what to do in case of an earth quake. "...if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear" (D&C 38:30).

We instructed every missionary to have a "go-bag" (36 hour kit). We reviewed our emergency action plan with them of where to go and what to do if they had phone service and in case they did not. We gave everyone a paper with all instructions in English and Spanish, and we reminded them that "this life is the time to prepare to meet God" (Alma 34:32-34). We shared with them our thoughts and feelings about the need for spiritual and physical safety.
Some of them became frightened and asked us if we knew something they didn't know. We smiled and repeated "...if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear." We didn't want to unduly alarm them, but we did want to impress upon them the need to be prepared. We reissued our challenge to "be prepared" in every way. Then we knelt with them in their apartment and dedicated each apartment, asking for a blessing of safety and security to be upon every apartment.....

As the earthquake became more violent, the mission home groaned and wailed. The power died, so the whole city was black. The windows made a hideous screeching sound, and flying objects banged against swaying walls. The printer/fax machine, books, book ends, and fifty-pound television burst from the entertainment center and crashed to the floor, cabinets emptied, drawers flew open, the refrigerator moved, water sloshed out of the toilets, the floor jolted up and down as we ran across it trying to hold onto the walls to keep from falling down, and the piano toppled over like a small toy. As we made our way to the back yard, I remember thinking, "God is all-powerful. He is our only refuge from this horrible mess." I prayed and prayed for Him to still the earth.

When we reached the back yard, we watched in terror. By the light of the moon we could see the swimming pool water form giant waves and crash out onto the rocks. House and car alarms screamed into the night...some from being crushed by falling debris and others, I guess, from the bizarre movement of the earth. I am not sure if the intense rumbling sounds came from the earth itself or from everything else that was shaking so violently. Finally, it stopped.

When the calm came, we had to sit down because our legs were weak and unstable. My legs stayed wobbly all day and night yesterday. Today the muscles in my legs hurt like I ran a marathon. The aftershocks have been extremely unsettling. Each one begins like the one last night started. We just close our eyes and wait to see if it escalates or dies down. I have never experienced anything like this!...

Thankfully, the Lord is in charge. He is the one to whom we must turn for refuge from every storm. He has the power to save us.

my hole.

I have a whole in my heart. Did I tell you that? It's true. It's been there for 5 years. It can't be seen by x rays, or the natural eye. But its there. And it will never go away. Sometimes I think its gone, but after days like this, I am reminded it's still there.

It's been 5 year 3 months 29 days since I've seen her face. I miss it. A lot.

Until the day I see her and touch her skin, my hole, burned into my heart by her death will forever be there.

Angels and Demons

Remember how I started doing movie reviews? Well I forgot to mention that I will be doing them WAY after they have been released. I don't really make it to the movie theater that much:)

I would give this movie 2 1/2 chickens (I don't want to use stars... everyone uses stars.) Here's my opinion:

P R O ' S

• WAY good dialogue. The conversations between science vs. religion was totally captivating.
• The story line. I did not read the book so it kept me guessing the whole time. I LOVE THAT. Usually I can predict how movies are gonna end... but not this one.
  
• No sex or hardly any swearing.

C O N ' S

• TOO MUCH VIOLENCE. Goodness gracious, people were dying everywhere. It was getting SO old. Plus some of the deaths were pretty gruesome. Not my cup of tea.
• When movies are made about another religion, I am always somewhat sensitive to the material in it. I don't know what's true to their faith or being made up. I don't want to assume weird things about them until I know the facts. Being a Mormon, I can totally sympathize with false doctrine being spread about ones faith.
• The freakin good guy ended up being the bad guy. I hate it when that happens in movies. I get too emotionally attached the characters.

Here was my favorite line from the movie. I find it quite profound:

science and religion are not enemies! There are simply some things that science is just too young to understand. So the church pleads: "stop", "slow down", "think", "wait"... and for this - they call us backward. But who is more ignorant: the man who cannot define lightning, or the man who does not respect its natural awesome power?

Quack. Quack. Im QUIRKY

I have a life long mission to live a transparent life. To complete this mission, it means I need embrace the inner me. ALL OF ME. Even my quirkiness.

On Tuesday I worked for basically 14 hours straight. By the end of the night I was so perma-fried, all socially normal behaviors went out the window! Any social dignity I had was gone. Lucky for me, I was at my own house so Robbie was the only one who got the CRAZY one women show.

In our bedroom, we have a small double door storage area built into the wall. While Robbie was brushing his teeth, I though I would be SO funny and attack him with tennis balls. I hid behind the door and waited for the enemy, aka Robbie to emerge into our bedroom. I had a hard time being silent behind the doors, because I was chuckling my evil little laugh. Robbie entered the room, and BAM! I threw about 15 tennis balls at him, and hit him TWICE. I was laughing so hard I couldn't even hit him.

Bless Robbie's heart for putting up with me:)

My quirkiness doesn't come out only after 14 hours of work. I am quirky 24/7. I decided to share with you a list of my daily quirks.

1. Every morning, I eat my cereal in Tupperware. I have no clue why I don't use a real bowl, but I don't.
Me + cereal in Tupperware = happiness

2. I am a creature of habit. When I start a new semester, I sit down in my classroom, and that seat becomes MINE for the whole semester. If someone else sits there one day, I secretly hate them.

3. I peel my banana's at the bottom. ALWAYS. No exceptions.

4. After I get done getting ready, I look in the mirror and smile at myself. Why? Your never fully dressed without a smile:)

5. I don't sleep with sheets. And my blanket can NEVER be tucked in. Drives me nuts.

6. If I am in a bathroom with a shower curtain, and that curtain is closed, I have to open it to see if there is a boogy man in there.

7. When I am turning up the volume on the remote, the number MUST be an even number. Except it can land on a 5. Five is the ONLY exception.

8. When I eat frosted mini-wheats, I separate them into 3 piles. 1) The sugary goodness ones to go in my Tupperware. 2) The not enough frosting ones. (they go in the garbage.) 3. The maybe pile. Ridiculous, I know.


Well this is all I could come up with since I have been sitting here in class for 20 minutes.

What are your quirks? Come on don't ashamed. EMBRACE your inner quirk


Since all posts are better with a picture. This is me after my 2hour Valentines Day nap.




happy friday.

loves.hugs.kisses.

jess.

Moments spared in time

for this month of L.O.V.E. i wanted to write little memories i have of you. memories that make me BEAM inside and out every time i think about them.


one. we were sitting in your car with the heater on full blast, staring at the temple that split between the trees. the lights from that magnificent structure made everything around us look as it was daylight. you were teasing me about something. and then it happened... you kissed me. kissed me for the first time.

and at that moment. time had stopped.

two. once again, we find ourselves sitting in the car. driving this time. driving home from a basketball game. i looked at you, you looked back. and that one look brought tears to eyes. happy tears. tears of joy because you were dating ME.

and at that moment, on the free way, time ceased to exist.

three. you rang the doorbell. the butterflies in my tummy were fluttering their little wings faster than they had ever fluttered before. i went to the door...actually i RAN to the door. My eyes met yours. and instantly all butterflies came to a hault. I was looking at my future husband. the man who came to take me to the temple. my eternal companion. my everything.

and at that moment, in my doorway, time was lost.

four. it was late. like 2 in the morning late. i was having a meltdown. tears were everywhere, and i had no idea if they would ever stop. my arms flung around your neck, and i squeezed you so tightly i was surprised you could breath. and in my ear you whispered words of love. i stopped.

and that moment, through my wet eyes, time was nowhere to be found.

five. once again it is late. this time 3 in the morning. you have been sleeping for hours. i crawl into bed, and immediately your body is wrapped around mine, and in your deep slumbers, instinctively you announced to me, "I LOVE YOU."

and at that moment, in the wee hours of the night, while you were fast asleep time was at a halt.

six. i was scared. scared to start my photography business. there were too many unknowns. and you know me, i don't like the unknown. you sat their, on the couch, for hours couching me and building my confidence. and your talk did it. it inspired me. it gave me the push i needed. you gave me wings. wings to fly.

and at that moment, with the wings on my back, time had dismissed itself.

seven. it happened last week. i was in the kitchen. i came to find you. i found you kneeling. kneeling at our bed praying to god. praying is not uncommon to you, but while i stared at you i felt like i could hear your prayers, hear you giving thanks to our lord and savior. i was overcome by the spirit. gratitude for you was spilling out of my soul.

and that moment, while your knees were down and prayers were being sent to up, time was frozen. frozen by god.


rob dog i love you. you are my love and my life.

happy love month everyone!

I don't wanna grow up....

I'm a Toy's R Us kid!

Robbie affectionately teases me probably on a daily basis on how I'm still like a little kid. And his teasing is true. I am SO like a little kid. So it got me thinking and I have come up with a list of ways I still have not grown up.

1. When given a choice to watch a movie, my instinct is to ALWAYS pick a Disney Movie. Here a few of my favorites:

{wow, I had a hard time just picking a few. I could have chosen WAY more:)}

2. I prefer drinking from a water bottle, because it makes me feel like its a baby bottle. Hmm... that's kind of embarrassing to admit!

3. I am still afraid of the dark. TRUE STORY! We can't go to sleep at night till I shut my eyes tight and grab the covers. THEN, Robbie can turn the light off.

4. When I'm sick or even just have a headache or tummy ache, I won't get medicine for myself. I like Robbie to do it because it makes feel like I'm being taken care of. My mom used to ALWAYS give me my medicine.

5. I still say Tummy:)

6. I can't hold still in church. It's true. One Sunday we were sitting in the pew in front of the bishops wife and family, and after sacrament meeting she tapped my shoulder and asked if I have ADD. Kind of embarrassing.

7. I wear my hair in braids AT LEAST once a week. Want proof? This is what I look like today:

8. I don't go pee until the very last second. Like right now, I am dancing in my chair, and squeezing my thighs together. TMI?

9. I may or may not whine till I get my way:) The sad thing about this one is Robbie doesn't give in to my whining.

10. You can bribe with me candy, and I'll do a chore.



Maybe after people read this post, they will stop asking us when we are going to have kids. They will see that Robbie already has one:) {P.S. It does NOT bug me when people ask us this.}

Power in Words

This was sent to me from my cousin. Its BEYOND beautiful.

THE INVITATION

---

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life's betrayals
or have become shriveled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your
fingers and toes
without cautioning us to
be careful
be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithful
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand on the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
"Yes."

It doesn't interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after a night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the center of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments.

- Oriah Mountain Dreamer
From Dreams of Desire (1995)
© 1995 by Oriah House. All Rights Reserved.
Published by Mountain Dreaming
300 Coxwell Avenue, Box 22546
Toronto, Ontario
Canada M4L 2A0

Oriah writes:

While I am pleased that this piece, The Invitation, has spoken to many others and happy that it is being shared, I would ask that you honour the original by sharing it as it was written.